Lake Arrowhead weekend

Sage's mom just re-did her cabin on the lake so we decided to escape the city and head up there. It was so super nice with a fantastic view of the lake from her deck. His mom, sister and cousin joined us on Saturday. It was Bill's first mountain trip too and we had plans to do some hiking along Deep Creek.

Saturday we hung out with Sage's old band-mates. All of them had dogs and band practice was on this sprawling hillside property, essentially a dog's playground, so Bill got to run free the whole time. The weather was clear and crisp, a nice change from SD lately. We decided to get up there a few times each month to enjoy the fresh air (and so sage could play guitar; his old mates are pressing him to join their band but he may just be an occasional guest appearance). Sunday we hiked Deep Creek, but not the nice groomed trail we did last spring. Sage wanted to show Bill and I a pool he used to hang out at but it involved some bushwhacking. We thrashed through brush and crawled over felled, burned trees. We even found what looked like a small human's leg bones under one such tree. It was not really my dream hike and Bill was having trouble with the terrain. We bailed and found the road. But Sage was determined so we tried another part of the creek. Although brush free, it consisted of steep rock walls along the creek that we had to scale at times, a difficult task with a new puppy. Bill was definitely hesitant about the whole thing and we ended up turning back before the pool. It was beautiful though, and Sage got to show off his bridge skills (which ended with him knee deep in the icy creek).

Later we met the band-mates at the ball field/dog park. Mountain dog park culture is not the same as here. There are no regulars and dogs aren't actually supposed to be off-leash, although they all are. Also, there was a bagpiper playing. After a mexican lunch with Steve and Liz, we hit the road. Bill was finally tired out and accepted his job as the backseat passenger with minor complaints. Here he is trying to stay awake but falling asleep while sitting up in his S&M style car harness we torture him with.

We got home by 6pm and cleaned up. To my absolute horror, I discovered a large black tic engorging himself in my back. His head was way in there and it hurt. I had thought it was a sunburn because of the radiating burning pain I had been experiencing since noon, although in hindsight my back had never been exposed to the sun. We burned his butt and he mostly backed out but left one of his suckers in there. I am awaiting a doctor's appointment now to finish the job. Weirdly, Bill has not one critter on him.

Weekending with Bill

Last weekend we spent hours each day at Fiesta Island dog park with Bill. He loved running through the tall grass but was less sure about the water at the shoreline.







He finally gave up trying to get in the water (or get us out) and just sat forlornly. Still, each day he was tired out enough to be cooperative about wearing his car harness. It has become an essential tool for keeping me on the road!

WARNING: more gratuitous puppy shots under the guise of my birthday

My 34th birthday weekend commenced with an impromptu viewing of Don Quichote (french responsible for weird spelling) at the opera downtown with Jane, my lovely date. During the first act, and to the incessant crinkle of lozenge wrappers being furiously opened by the octogenarian in the seat next to me, I decided that opera is just not for me. This was my third opera (as long as we are not counting Phantom...did I hear a groan?) and although it was a decent show, I could not stifle my yawning once the music started. It must be a physiological reaction to long drawn out singing in a romance language. I have to say though that the scenery was amazing (especially the windmill/giants in Act II) and you can never beat the people watching at an opera. Another highlight was Jane informing me in response to the TB-like cough next to me, that sputum cultures are absolutely inappropriate to perform unless there has been exposure to some serious disease. A cough alone just simply does not justify it. Good to know.

Saturday we started the day off by taking Bill to a local Vizsla club where he could socialize with other vizslas and run around on the beach. It was really funny to see 5 identical pups rolling around with each other. And also interesting to see a bunch of adults and talk to their owners. Bill was absolutely knocked out tired afterwards and passed out in his kennel for about 3 hours.

That night we celebrated early with Jake and Jen in LA and some more local folks. We got to hang out with the Bliss baby and I held her for at least 20 minutes without making her cry, quite a feat! Nina made me the most fabulous chocolate raspberry cake, which sage thoroughly kept enjoying through the early morning hours! The night was fantastic...but way too short to catch up with people. It deserves a repeat quite soon!







































Sunday we had an exciting day planned. We started with Puppy school where Bill could do some organized play with some other pups and we could learn some basic obedience. Aside from trying to poop twice in the play room, he did great and was the most calm pup there. All the others were barking at each other to play the whole time and Bill just sat calmly at our feet surveying the scene. Apparently he is very calm for his breed, which we are happy about. Barking has got to be my least favorite thing about dogs. He seemed to be a quick learner and can do sit and stand with treats but stand is totally lost on him. He just loses complete interest in the treat when we try that one. But we are going to keep at it and hopefully he will learn more over the next 6 weeks.

After school we took him to dog beach to tire him out before my bday BBQ later that night. He wasn't the only one who got tuckered out though. When everyone was awake we had a few people over for a chicken dinner. Festivities were over by 6:30pm, the perfect time to start relaxing for the end of a Sunday. We needed it! Next weekend we may tackle our taxes.

Battle Scars

One week ago, Sage and I took the plunge we had been pondering for months and adopted a puppy. We had decided on a Vizsla, a breed I have wanted for years. A smaller version of a Weimaraner, they are known for their calmer temperament. Took us a few days but we finally came up with a name, Bill. The last week has been an adventure to say the least. Although Bill is a quick learner, he still is a puppy and we had jumped into this thinking we would come up with a training plan as we got to know him. We have taught him to sit and come and more or less pee outside but I have had this constant worry in the pit of my stomach every since we got him. Like he came to us this perfect little puppy and our actions have the opportunity to chip away at this perfection day by day. Sleep has evaded me most nights as I check on him every time he shifts in his crate by the bed, wondering if he is happy or his bladder is about to explode.

It has definitely been fun though. Taking him to the dog park and dog beach, watching him play with every single dog he encounters. His charm even inspires the most tired old dogs to playfully hop around with him. Despite his energy outside, at home he is a totally couch potato and loves inserting his body into whatever space he can find between us or just spreading his 24 lb. body out across as much of the couch as possible when sitting alone. Most nights we find ourselves in a 3-some embrace on the couch with small puppy head and legs sticking out in every direction.

Still, it is work and has completely staved off any desire I have had for a real human baby. After a completely sleepless night on V-day (spent arguing with sage about training tactics and checking on the Bill), we groggily dragged ourselves to a local outdoor breakfast joint with doggy in tow. We picked a table next to an older couple with a cute spaniel and Bill and he made googally eyes at each other across the aisle. The couple left and was replaced by a young hip couple with two huge dogs, one a very solid tiger-print pitbull and the other an unusually heavy yellow lab. The pit seemed sort of interested in Bill and his playful sniffing but the enormous lab curled her lip at him and then sat down. In hindsight, I should not have ignored this but at the time I just figured it was an initial dislike that would not amount to anything. The dogs kept shifting around and after 15 minutes I hear a loud snarl and horrifyingly, the desperate yelping of my new perfect puppy. I grabbed him and held him but he was wiggling and crazed and continued to cry hysterically for at least a minute. When we finally calmed him down we found a cut on his lower eyelid and the top of his head. The lab had chomped him and he was lucky he did not lose an eye! At the end of my wits in my sleep deprived state, I started bawling and told sage i was taking him out of teh restaurant. I cradled him in my arms tightly to calm him down b/c he was still shaking and walked to a bench at the other side of the park. Restaurant patrons, park goers who had overheard literally followed me to see if he was ok. Then the cops pulled up and kicked me out of the park which apparently did not allow dogs. Amidst it all I was still crying and surely looked like one of those crazy dog people. I just could not calm down. After I had settled down further away, a homeless man approached and said he had also heard and wanted to check on Bill. He reassured me that motherhood was tough but that Bill would be ok and things would get esaier. Then he gave me the peace sign and strolled away. Sage finally joined me and said we should get him to the ER vet (since it was the weekend) and that the owner of the lab had paid for our breakfast and said he would pay any associated bills.

Once at the vet we found a cut inside Bill's ear and he had developed a bloody nose, which was kind of freaky. The vet did not seem worried and patched him up and checked for eye ulcers and we were on our way. I got a much needed nap while sage hung out with Bill, who seemed completely recovered and was romping around the yard within minutes of being home.

We are finally settling into a groove with the training and I am feeling less nervous about screwing him up. It will just be how it is I suppose. I have the Monks of New Skete guiding my training program and we also start puppy pre-school next saturday where he will be able to socialize with other pups and we will all learn some basic obedience stuff.

I woke up this morning confident that we would have no accidents and i would actually be able to get some writing done at home while he peacefully slept in the kennel. While I was preparing his breakfast, I looked at him on the couch to make sure he wasn't doing anything bad and low and behold he was in the process of drenching the couch in pee! It looks like a fire hose (ok, a tiny fire hose) was let loose in here. Jeez, will it never end?

Holy Buffet

Most weekends since Sage and I moved in together, we wake up by 8am on Saturday morning and by the time we have breakfast he has come up with a fun activity to do that day or the whole weekend. Whatever the bee in his bonnet is usually requires immediate action. I more or less have accepted this ritual and have resigned to not get anything of my own done (usually writing) during these two days. Two weekends ago as we sat staring at the larger than usual waves coming in over breakfast the idea was sea kayaking. I vetoed this pretty quick, pointing to the waves. Ok then, rock wall climbing. Despite my intense fear of heights, he almost had me on that one, but further discussion revealed my arms were still sore from my last workout, phew. Moving on...the Palomar observatory involving a 2 hr windy drive into the mountains and above the snow line. I was in and it really was beautiful, plus the observatory itself was very interesting. The views of San Gorgonio and San Jacinto were gorgeous! Last weekend he came up with Palm Springs, where I had never been. We literally spent 12 hours there, at one point finding ourselves at the top of San Jacinto (picture to left is view of Jacinto from our motel hottub-clearly his process is linear), and then Sunday morning his bee took us to Joshua Tree and then a drive home alongside the Salton Sea, which has gotta be the most depressing place in southern California. But the rest of the sites were awesome!

This weekend I knew I had to get some work done so I gave him daily warnings starting on Wednesday that I would have to stay in all weekend and write. He complied and Saturday passed uneventfully with him quietly reading on the couch and me crunching data. Sunday we woke up and made breakfast. Truthfully, I was in no mood to work. So when he said he had an idea, I was open. This weekend was a bit different though. He suggested we go to church.

We had been throwing this idea around since he had quit drinking so it was not a new concept. Neither one of us was particularly religious, although both from Irish Catholic families. I have probably been in a church less than 30 times in my life, including ALL weddings and baptisms in my extended family and the requisite visits when touring European countries. Because I had never even been baptized, every visit to a house of god was fraught with insecurity: "do I stand out? am I doing something wrong? how should I be sitting? can they tell I'm a heathen just from my posture?", leaving me with an overall uncomfortable feeling. But the draw for us was finding community and perhaps even a good sermon or two that would allow us to reflect on our collective journey. When we were in Palm Springs the weekend before we had walked past a church service letting out and were a bit touched by the elderly priest tottering around in his green robe bidding farewell to each member of his congregation. It was quaint and peaceful, jiving with most of the churchy memories from my childhood. Recalling that image made going along with Sage's plan easy.

He suggested one we had gone by many times, a big church he described as non-denominational. I am no church-jargon expert and the term "non-denominational" sounded to me like accepting, no pressure, even liberal came to mind. We arrived and the place was packed, the crowd was diverse and most people were dressed very casually (reinforcing my at-ease attitude). We followed the large crowd into the "sanctuary" where the sermon would be. I was shocked! This was no pew-lined quaint little country church. There was stadium seating for 1000 people and lights and cameras all pointing to a huge stage that spanned at least 400 feet across the back wall which itself was covered in blinking digital imagery. There was also a full set of rock band instruments to the side. This was like no church I had ever experienced. Although a bit weird, the non-traditional interior reinforced my idea that I was in a very liberal place.

The band came out and sang a few songs...the members looked like your run-of-the-mill indie rock band (flannel shirts and black thick-rimmed glasses). The lyrics (which appeared above them on the 400 foot screen) were upbeat enough but were all about Jesus and Josanna and following His word. Still, it seemed normal, i mean we were in church. A little Jesus talk comes with the territory. One man a few rows ahead of us stood up the duration of the singing with his arms up and out-stretched and palms open. I thought "oh, that's nice, he probably gets more of the feel of the music like that, sort of like a prayer". I tried to remain as neutral as possible, non-judging, because I really had no idea how sage was taking it all in. For all I knew, he was feeling like he had come home. So I remained open and relaxed, which was surprisingly easy.

Then two guys came out on stage, dressed very trendy, one in a v-neck tee and one of those modern fedora type hats. They did a sort of back and forth comic routine advertising all the teen, young married couple, financial planning etc. support groups sponsored though the church. From the clothing and his jokes about fashion I suspected one of them was gay and I thought "oh, that's nice, this is a church that accepts gays as pastors, very liberal!". I was even more at ease. Then more music and then the real pastor came out, actually he was filling in for the real one who was at home watching the Superbowl. He was disabled and his voice was very distorted by his disability but after a few minutes I could follow him pretty clearly. He was very funny and told a convoluted story about going to Disney land, the pool of Bethesda and his struggle being disabled. Throughout his sermon he said things like "give yourself over to Jesus" and "worship Jesus" and the like. I was feeling open enough to get his meaning without being put off by the language. His message all came together in the end about how life is a choice and you can choose between being bitter and better. It was cool and it definitely spoke to me about some things sage and I had been dealing with lately.

Then more music about His Majesty, with most of the congregation striking the open palm stance with gusto. Then we were let out. We walked to the car in silence, me waiting to gauge how he felt about it before I jumped in with my impressions, just in case he was thinking he would be coming here every Sunday. He finally asked me what I thought and when I said it was an "interesting" experience and I liked the sermon he agreed and admitted the music was horribly cheesy and the Jesus talk was over the top. We talked for over an hour about the experience. Then it came out...Sage informed me that it was a born again church, he thought it had been brutally obvious to me. In fact, he called it a 'Mega-church', a term I had heard often and one that did not necessarily have the most liberal, accepting and pressure-less associations in my mind. I learned later that this church had held one of the biggest rallies supporting Yes on Prop 8, the bill banning gay marriage in California, a bill I had vehemently opposed. I realized I could probably be sure that most of the people sitting around me bopping to the jesus tunes did not see eye to eye with me on most issues (i.e. abortion, pre-marital sex, and yes, even evolution) and that probably after a conversation I would not find them "accepting", let alone liberal.

It was almost laughable that it had not dawned on me the moment I had stepped into the spectacle that was Sanctuary. But I am sort of glad it didn't. Surely if I had gone in knowing the above, I would have been totally uncomfortable, closed, and every "Jesus!" would have made my skin itch and push me closer to a state of self-induced hyper-ventilation. Not having this armor on allowed me to approach the whole experience without expectations and really listen to the sermon. This is NOT to say I am now on the road to follow Jesus. It is quite hard for me to digest all that talk about salvation and worship. I wouldn't be opposed to going back there but would probably get a lot less out of it the next time. It is beside the point anyway. If I was looking for people to agree with my social politics I would likely not even find it in the white steepled churches of my youth, but they were what I knew. It was refreshing to see something different and be able to listen to their lessons without pretense, but also without the internal pressure to conform. Still, I woke up at 2am this morning feeling a bit unsettled that I had let myself open up unknowingly to something I have always felt I could not stomach. But perhaps there is a lesson there...

Sage and I are more or less on the same page and have decided to make this an experiment. On Sundays, when we are not chasing his buzzing bee to some distant corner of California, we are going to attend a service, a different church each time and ignoring any information about the church beforehand, save the time and location of the service. We live in a neighborhood that is certainly not lacking in churches. There is one on every block on some streets with very little denominational overlap.

Sage hopes we can catch a sermon from every existing denomination (Jehovah's witnesses: "they come to my door, why can't I go to there's?") but I have a feeling there are a few that might not let us in. Like that shiny mormon temple on the I-5 or probably most mosques. I realize this plan may sound unacceptable to anyone who takes one religion even remotely seriously. But as a religious outsider, this approach is key for me. The less I know about where I am going, the less I will engage my preconceived notions about that particular religion and the more I will be able to listen and take the sermons at face value and as they speak to me. Hopefully we will find one or two we would like to keep going back to when we feel the need.

San Francisco in the new year

Sage and I headed up to "Frisco" (as he calls it) to catch a bluegrass show and visit becca and alex and bruno and the fig. We arrived at SFO around 7pm to find our cheap sub-compact rental car was a Prius! It was awesome, except we had no idea how to start the thing. After pressing every button on the dash that seemed intuitive to a 20th century driver, we had to get some assistance. With the unsettled feeling of being 16 again, we pulled our space mobile out of the airport garage and hit the road. Hot Buttered Rum was playing at the Fillmore around 10pm so we had a couple hours to share Cancun burritos with B & A. The place was loud with mexican polka and we were surrounded by the standard SF hipster crowd, all of which gave sage his first realization that we were not in Kansas (SD) anymore. HBR was amazing! Those guys love playing together and it is so much fun to watch. They played a few Talking Heads songs which were great. We were both psyched and despite having woken up early and having full days of work and travel we were able to make it almost to the end of the show. Then we got back in our jetson mobile, ambled through the castro and back to bernal heights by 1:30am.

The next day becca took us for a northern tour through Muir Woods, where we had a lengthy discussion about Werner Hertzog and retaining walls, and then out to the Pine Cone diner in Point Reyes. We discovered two things: 1) that a BLT with avocado is called a BLAT and 2) that ice cream places are closed throughout the region during the month of January.

That night B & A took us to a great 6 table cajun joint in ocean beach where we dined on scallops and hanger steak. Back in BH we got a personalized slide show of their trips to machu picchu (where we are enticed to go in Sept.) and egypt, not to mention almost every food item they had consumed since the summer of 2005. It was spectacularly gooey photography and gave sage an ounce of appreciation for why we are all crazy about food. They also let us in on their new super mario bros. obsession.

The next day we hopped in the space jet and headed to Alcatraz. Luckily, Sage was able to complete his SF tourist wardrobe in the gift shop at the dock on the Embarcadero. (what you cannot see is another alcatraz tee under the sweatshirt.)

Alcatraz was cool. By far, the best audio tour I have ever done. We were immersed in a dark world of antiquated prison life, narrated by both ex guards and ex inmates. Surprisingly they downplayed their most famous guest, Al Capone and focused more on the siege and other escape attempts.

Sage gave his best hardened criminal face. Pretty convincing. We all tried to figure out which criminal we were. Becca and I were the ones who would sit and wait for release, biding our time knitting and reading. Sage was sure he was the escapist type and, while he admitted he would also spend a good deal of time knitting, would be sizing up possible escape routes and fashioning spoons into concrete shovels.

This was the dingy view of the city from the cell block hallway. It is so close that the inmates could hear the voices of people partying on New Years when the wind was right...creepy.

It was a relief getting back to shore and freedom. Those walls have seen way too much for it not to affect visitors. One more mission burrito later (this time from El Farolito), then we said goodbye and pointed our ship back to the airport. It was the perfect weekend getaway and we will certainly be doing it again soon!